Solitude

There is solitude this afternoon, just like I prayed for last night. i Love when God makes Himself known even in those little ways.  The television has been silenced. The windows are open and I can hear the thin palm leaves rustling against one another. The wind chimes add their light 'cling-clang' and the birds join in song. A rejoice symphony of sun. I am peeling and slicing apples to make fresh apple butter, the organic mist scenting my clothes as I slice. The kettle has just whistled with furry and I pour myself some fresh mint and cacao tea; loose-leaf, of course. :)
If only my surroundings would sing the same song. Instead of being in the rush of a city, my home would be down some dirt road on a countryside where GPS devices start getting all screwy and there would be a man to call 'warrior' somewhere in the mix. So here I am, dreaming. Again. How is it that this thought and hope of love is seemingly tangible and yet so far away? It taunts me. Haunts me. Is it just the nature of women, or is it rooted in the desire that God has placed within me to raise a family fearless to proclaim the gospel of Christ: a missionary family? Does this happen to you too, whoever you are? Will it ever meet up to our dreams, or are they misleading? I wish that I knew, but instead I am left to trust God... But where else would I want to be? :)

" Where shall I go from your Spirit? Or where shall I flee from your presence? If I ascend to heaven, you are there! If I make my bed in hell, you are there! If I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me." -Psalm 139:7-10
-Blessed :)

A Snack For Our Trip

 So this is how it is gonna go down: I started writing somewhat of a story a few months back. It is really just a compilation of thoughts around a similar subject. The foundation is built upon the bittersweetness of love and how gruesome it can be from both an emotional and spiritual standpoint as well as the differences between what the world says, and what Christ says. Today I want to post part of it. Later on I may post a little more. :) This writing has sprung out of a new courage that Christ has equipped me with in this fresh season of my life and has brought ponderings to my mind. My hope to to hear the thoughts of others and we can explore together. So,  here is a little to chew on!... a snack for our trip ;-)

The Introduction: A Gruesome Beauty
~ Love does unspeakable things to one’s heart. Some things filled with beauty and others that cause us to question the very essence of it; curse it almost, despise it. Love is something that seeps into the crevices of brokenness and other dark places within and mends them. Sometimes only for a season, leaving those gaps either healed or re-exposed, perhaps even larger than their gruesome beginning. For love is a gruesome beauty. ~

The Adventure Begins

It's a new year. The smell of cracked fireworks lines the inside of my nostrils; the sky clouded with the fog of a bright moment. I breathe in a little more of the smokey excitement into my lungs. The smell, not as grand as a bonfire, but still intriguing. It's never felt more like a new year, a fresh start, than this year. It's never felt more like Christmas that it did a week ago. I can tell already that this year is going to be different and I can not wait to see what flowers it has to bloom before me.

So this year I write a blog. And you are reading it. I feel so blessed, whoever you are. And here is my promise to you: to write, when life allows, that is. I can not promise you any more. And if that is not enough for you, then I suggest that you not read this, for I feel that you would not understand the reality of my heart or the courage that I have been graced to enter. So here I am. Open. Real. Bold.
And that's all I can offer.
-Thankful